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My Brother March 8, 2009

Posted by claudemontgomery in Claude's Story.

Without descending into the trap of my life story, I think there are a few key characteristics and events in my life that are pertinent to this discussion.  First of all, there is a history of mental illness in my family.  I am now in my forties but when I was a teen my older brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia.  After being heavily medicated, he took his own life at the age of 21.

As I said before, I have never completely aligned my ideas about health (or mental health) with the western medical establishment.  So, when I say that my brother “was diagnosed with schizophrenia” I am just stating the facts and not necessarily countersigning them.  I do believe from my personal interaction with my brother during his time of difficulty that he had in fact lost touch with reality in this world as most of us know it.

With this having been disclosed, I believe that had my recent experiences begun at that tender age – I am not sure that I would have survived.  At that time, not only did the internet not exist but so much of the spiritual knowledge base about these things had not yet migrated to the West.  I also remember those years as much more naïve and repressed times – not to mention that the early twenties is a challenging era even today.  Yet, here I am living – and by some standards thriving – at a time where I spend twenty-five to seventy-five percent of any given day hallucinating and enjoying it.

I will leave to each reader conclusions about how my brother’s plight so long ago may or may not be applicable to my life almost thirty years later.  I suppose in some ways I believe that he was perhaps more highly sensitive to this phenomenon than I, and that he had no guidance or information whatsoever.  Or maybe he was just a schizophrenic.



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